The rental guy: Another one for the fail blog

It's been what, a month and a half since I've been single again?  I made the decision that I wanted to spend some time alone, not seriously dating anyone in particular.  So the Rental Guy brought up some questions, like: What are my thoughts about casual dating in general right now?

The Rental Guy:
So around the time I became single again some child decided that turning his signal lights on gave him right of way, despite the fact that my car was not only beside his but also slightly ahead of his in the next lane.  Long story short, he hit me.  Now that his insurance company has finally taken responsibility for the accident I get to fix my car ... again!

Now for my fail. Just for reference, Italics are for my internal running thought process/commentary while this was happening .

Enterprise comes to pick me up at the auto shop to take me to get a rental, and he's an okay looking guy.  Adorable face, great smile, and a body like a high school footballer who let himself go a little bit, but could easily get back with a few trips to the gym.  He introduces himself and we start up a conversation.  Good flow with no awkward pauses.  We're in the car driving to Enterprise when it dawns on me, he's totally flirting.  These are getting to know you type questions.  I'm expressing genuine interest type questions. My actions are being perceived as flirty. Honestly, being friendly is not flirting but apparently that is what's going on. PAUSE, said my brain.  Be kind, REWIND.  "Friendly is NOT flirting."  I take a cue from myself and reframe.

He's being friendly. Duh silly girl it's his job to start up a conversation and be courteous.

The thought of flirting is dismissed and I settle back into the flow of conversation.  There's still a vibe I can't quite kick,  but I ignore it in the interest of politeness.  Once the short drive is through, we head into the office and complete the necessary paperwork, and he goes to get a car.  He then calls me to the desks and informs me that he accidentally charged me the full deposit amount of 350$. Holy Crapola! I'm glad that went through, otherwise I'd be really embarrassed right now.  After apologizing and refunding the proper portion of that deposit, he takes me to the car. A Dodge Charger!! Are you Freaking Kidding ME!!! I'm so excited!

When he's done inspecting the car, he continues apologizing, letting me know that he feels really bad about everything and that he's going to cover the taxes, write that there was no gas in the car and I could bring it back empty and basically not have to pay very much if anything at all upon returning the vehicle. SCORE! but weird/extreme.  I thank him for the generous offer and validate that he was probably distracted and working on autopilot it wasn't necessary but I truly appreciate it. We hop in the car and he drives me to the exit where he says :

"Well I live in (place that isn't too far from me which he knows because I had to give him my address earlier).  I don't know if you have a boyfriend or anything, but if you ever wanted to hang out .."

The rest kind of trails away because I'm in my own world trying to figure out what the right thing to say is and What the hell just happened? I knew it! I freaking knew it! What the hell do I do now? What actually came out of my ingenious unfiltered mouth?

"No, I don't."

Seriously? What the hell was that an answer to? No, I don't want to hang out with you.  or No I don't have a boyfriend. Clearly I knew what it meant but did he?

The following exchange was boring, a handshake, direct eye contact, nice meeting you..  perfect opportunity to put it back in his court with a quick "well you have my number."  That's not what happened though. I shook his hand and waved awkwardly from the driver's seat.  That's another one for the fail blog.  I guess it starts now.  As far as the question posed earlier, I'm not sure I'm quite ready to start casually dating just yet, but I'm loving the boost in my ego gents. THANKS!

#blogram #instablog #datingfailbloglives #herewegoagain #didimentiontherewasanotherpassengerduringthatcarride #therewasasecondpassenger #hewasanothercustomer #secondlevelawkward

Complacency

Dear Webster,

You fail to accurately define the term "Complacency."
Included are my revisions to your text.  Please note:

Complacency (N):
1. Silent murderer of once passionate relationships.
Synonym: Friendship
Antonym: Lover
Complacency (V):
2. The act of unwittingly replacing passion with the milder emotion, affection.
Synonym: Negligent, Selfish
Antonym: Attentive, Caring

No credit needed. Simply edit text promptly so as not to create any further confusion.

Best Regards,

Those who have learned and hope to be better.

Ain't Nothing (What loving you has taught me pt.1)

Hint about who I might be writing about: Who is the first person you should learn to love before you even attempt to love another human being thoroughly and entirely?

Ain't Nothing

I'm sorry, were you looking at me?
Did you find something wrong?
Did you see a mistake?
Am I not the right size?
Am I not the right hue?
Yes! I'm talking to you.

Did you find a glitch in your little niche?
No?
Yeah, that's right.
Because there is nothing wrong with the length of my legs
or the width of my waist.

No, there is nothing wrong with the thick of my thighs
or my handles of love.
I see no annoyance in the deep of my eyes
the round of my face
and flat little nose

I feel no big problem in the strength of my pride
and have no reason to hide
It seems we're not that different
you and me.
So I guess there ain't nothing wrong with me.

#blogram #Singlelarity #WLYHTM

Loving you series

Hi!!!

So, I've decided that I'm going to do a series of poems over the course of the next few months. I shall call this series: What loving you has taught me.  If you remember I wrote a poem near the end of last year by that same title.  But if you forgot about it or didn't read it I turned the title into a link so reread it... don't reread it.... or... reread it  just to be nice. Anywho, the poems in this series will be about people who have touched my life, either negatively or positively, it'll just depend on who it's about.  I won't ever tell you who the person is, just what the experience of knowing him/her has been like and what they've taught me.  I'll start next month so I can actually get to writing one.  I'm excited about this and I think it'll be helpful as far as work is concerned.

Toodles!

A Bloggers evolution

Well, as you all know, I am no longer single. So why keep up with this blog? The meaning Single-larity has changed several times in the few short years I have had it. At first it was a dating fail blog. Then it was about becoming comfortable with my singleness. Then I realized this blog was never about dating or the fact that I was single at all. I started this blog as a means to evolve and grow within myself. Admittedly I don't keep up with it as much as I should but changes are being made.

You see, though we are all connected and intertwined, we are all single entities. If we cannot learn to find comfort in ourselves and love the persons we are creating we cannot hope to or even dream to find another human being who will love us, entirely for who we truly are (run-on sentence). How can they, if we are not comfortable enough to show others our true faces. I am personally guilty of wearing many masks. I was raised to believe that there was an appropriate time and place to behave certain ways. Recently, however, I've learned that being completely myself is all I have to be. In certain circumstances I act in varying degrees of myself but never in a way that is contrary to who I believe myself to be.

Thus, Single-larity is here to stay. To evolve as I evolve and become whatever I need it to become. I hope you continue to follow my journey. It has been a good journey and I'm positive it will continue to be.

Till next time Lovies.

Toodles!

-Greey

Lessons from a dog and a Writer's insecurity

http://instagram.com/p/X7XI91srks/

Hello Blogoshpere!

Where have I been?! It has taken me entirely too long to get back here. I mean literally. I could not for the life of me figure out my password or email for that matter. It was getting ridiculous! But I figured it out and here I am! YAY!

This month is National poetry month!!! and I'm way behind on the 30 poems for 30 days. I'm not too sure if I can even do 30 but I sure will try!! They'll most likely be rough cuts and unfinished work but at least I'm trying?

Before I get to the two poems I have for you today I would just like to say Grad school is hard. It's hard to focus on, hard to get started on, hard to get through, but anything worth doing usually isn't easy. Am I right? Also, I love Da Poetry Lounge. I haven't been there in MONTHS and it still feels like home. Going there feds my soul and sets a fire under my butt to remind me "Hey! Aren't you a writer too? Where's your work? Why are you slacking?" Anyway, it's time to get to cooking so the next time I go home I have something for the table, because it's a potluck (I never knew really knew how to spell that word till now, disgraceful!). There has to be some give in my take. OK! without further ado! Poem one!

Lessons from a dog

Dear Betsy,

Your ears are too long

You shed far too much

You bark for no reason

You don't always listen

You're a big fatty brat

     'cause I spoil you like that

You're a silly little spaz

     which makes me laugh

Most notably

You bravely run out into the world

though you're tiny and scared.

I wish I were more like you

but slightly more prepared.

That was a fun one to write. Alright, if you're ready for it.... Poem deux... 

A writer's insecurity

I do not like the sound of my own voice

in my mousier years, I didn't know it existed

Am I proud of my voice?

In the confines of my room where I whisper words to corners that echo back my praises,

Yes. Emphatically, YES!

But here, where others ears might listen

Other opinions seem to matter

Where other poems have battled for supremacy

I fear it is not poet enough to stand amongst the rest

It does not crack at the tender moments

It does not raise for emphasis

It does not wreak of strong enough woman battling or hurdling obstacle

I fear it knows only petty love songs

and though I love petty love songs

I wish my voice were larger

So it could move people to tears

Or to action in the name of a just cause like

Love yourself

Fun times! Ok... 30 poems for 30 days. Two down? 28 more to go. 

Thanks for reading y'all!

Greey <3

Onward and Upward

It's February!!

And for the first time in a long time I will not be celebrating Singles Awareness Day!!!

So what has the new year brought? Let's see.

The year of BIGGER BETTER BRIGHTER has ended and what a year that was. Everything truly was bigger better and brighter. I went back to school (and I'm doing well i might add). I met a several interesting people, made a few new friends, Jon Doe came back into my life (dun dun dun!!!!), wasn't able to forgive him (turns out that was for the best). I spent an entire month and a half in HAWAII!!! What an experience that was. I fell in love. Yes, I fell in love!! With an amazing guy who is so good to me and so perfect. It was absurdly unnerving at first but I'm learning to settle into it. I might very well be in the honeymoon stage still and thus profoundly disgustingly in love, BUT I LOVE IT!! I would like very much to stay here because for once I'm not scared! I feel safe, how often does that feeling come along? For me, that's hardly ever.

So what shall the new year hold? Let me tell you!

The year of ONWARD AND UPWARD has begun!!! There's no where to go but up up UP!! The past few years I've been on the way up, it's been difficult to see at times but the progress was there. There have definitely been bumps and bruises and huge massive gashes that bled an awful lot of my soul out but the universe is kind and always gave back. I have, as I have always had, my beautiful ever loving family and close friends. Despite how frustrating they are I'm so grateful to have them all. THUS, onward and upward to an even better future full of possibility, which may also include heartbreak, or ever lasting love. For sure it includes greater strides toward accomplishing my dreams and becoming successful so I have nothing but high hopes for myself and my loved ones and YOU!

Onward and Upward friends!

Take the uncertainty with you because, lets be honest, as scary as it can be it leads to some pretty interseting times.

Till next time!